lost memories

Dear you,

I didn’t mean to forget.

“Some things are hard to remember.”

I can’t imagine how heartbroken you must have felt the day I told you I couldn’t remember any past memories of us. You stared back at me with those dark brown eyes and with a faltering smile, told me it was okay. You ignored the stabbing pains of your heart and began to tell our story. You told me everything, from our first date to that summer we spent playing Pokemon games and exploring random parts of the city. You reminisced to the first time we exchanged I love yous to each other and with each passing detail, your eyes began to overflow with tears and stream down your face. I felt so hopeless. There was nothing I could do to ease your torture except to slowly wipe your tears.

Through all of this, I was not able to comprehend how you must have felt. You know that I didn’t mean to forget all of the memories we have shared, that I was stressed out with the complications of my own life that I was compelled to purge the most valuable memories we’ve shared to make room in my mind for other aspects like schoolwork. If I were in your shoes, I don’t think I would be able to empathize. How could I forget all of the moments that we have shared?

Although I may have forgotten some key events of our relationship, I have never forgotten the love behind those lost memories. The smiles and laughter we shared will forever be sketched in my heart. I will always remember how crazy I was about you. Your adorable dimples, the wrinkles your eyes make when you smile, everything just keeps repeating over and over in my head. I could never manage to get you off my mind.

There may be moments where memories of us are lost in the subconscious of my brain,  but there’s one thing I can promise, I will never forget you.

Sincerely,

Me

spirited away

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